Choosing A Wife

Three couples marry and stay at the same hotel for their honeymoons, where they are taken care of by Dave the bellboy.

The first man married a nurse.
Dave thinks to himself, “Nice, nurses are known to be hot.”

nurse

The second man married a telephone operator.
Dave thinks to himself, “Telephone operators have sexy voices.”

phone operator

The third man married a school teacher.
Dave thinks to himself, “Poor guy, teachers are too strict.”

teacher

The next morning, Dave reports to work and gets a room service call from the nurse’s husband. He sourly says, “Don’t ever marry a nurse. All I heard last night was ‘You’re not sanitary, you’re not sanitary.'”

Then, the telephone operator’s husband calls and sourly says, “Don’t ever marry a telephone operator. All I heard last night was ‘Your three minutes are up, your three minutes are up.'”

Later that afternoon, the teacher’s husband calls and happily says, “When you marry, be sure to marry a school teacher. All I heard last night was ‘We are going to do this over and over until we get it right!'”

No Greater Loss!

A lawyer, who had just bought a new car was eager to show it off to his colleagues, when all of a sudden, an eighteen wheeler came out of nowhere and took off the driver’s side door with him standing right there.

“NOOO!” he screamed, because he knew that no matter how well a mechanic fixed it, it never would be the same again.

Eventually, a policeman came by, and the lawyer ran up to him yelling: “MY MERCEDES DOOR WAS JUST RIPPED OFF BY SOME IDIOT IN A LORRY!”

lawyer and mercedes

“You’re a lawyer aren’t you?” asked the policeman.

“Yes, I am, but what does this have to do with my car?” the lawyer asked.

“HA!” the policeman replied, “You lawyers are always so materialistic. All you care about are material possessions. I bet you didn’t even notice that your left arm is missing did you?” the cop said.

The lawyer looked down at his side and exclaimed: “MY ROLEX! MY ROLEX!”

Why the Arab Israeli Conflict Refuses Resolution

Beyond the Cusp

The reason the Arab Israeli conflict refuses all efforts for a resolution is simply because everyone treats it as if it is about land, but land is only a secondary issue. The small part that land plays can be simply stated as to why that cannot be solved as there is no solution which leaves both sides living together in peace and security. The only solution acceptable to the Arab side despite all that has ever been started outright is for Israel to be destroyed, utterly and completely destroyed. There can be no two states living side-by-side in peace and security because as long as Israel is permitted to rule over themselves there can be no peace. Israel is far from the only problem in this area as Jordan and Lebanon also must be erased leaving only Syria and that too would need redefining as simply a province in the…

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Muslim Reform Movement

Preamble

We are Muslims who live in the 21st century. We stand for a respectful, merciful and inclusive interpretation of Islam. We are in a battle for the soul of Islam, and an Islamic renewal must defeat the ideology of Islamism, or politicized Islam, which seeks to create Islamic states, as well as an Islamic caliphate. We seek to reclaim the progressive spirit with which Islam was born in the 7th century to fast forward it into the 21st century. We support the Universal Declaration of Human Rights, which was adopted by United Nations member states in 1948.

We reject interpretations of Islam that call for any violence, social injustice and politicized Islam. Facing the threat of terrorism, intolerance, and social injustice in the name of Islam, we have reflected on how we can transform our communities based on three principles: peace, human rights and secular governance. We are announcing today the formation of an international initiative: the Muslim Reform Movement.

We have courageous reformers from around the world who will outline our Declaration for Muslim Reform, a living document that we will continue to enhance as our journey continues. We invite our fellow Muslims and neighbors to join us.

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