Would You Re-marry?

A married couple are in bed and the wife says to the husband “would you re-marry if I died.”

The husband replied “I guess, the kids would need a mother and I might be lonely.”

The wife said “would you give her my car?”

The husband said “well, your dead, you don’t need it.”

The wife said “would you give her my jewellery?”

The husband said “I guess, unless you want to be buried with them!”

The wife said “would you give her my golf clubs?”

The husband said “no, she’s not right handed!!!”

The Arab States and the Refugees

The report ends on a depressing note: the six Arab Gulf countries (Saudi Arabia, Qatar, Oman, the UAE, Kuwait and Bahrain) have offered zero — repeat: zero — places for desperate refugees.

Put another way, six countries that speak the same language (admittedly with strong regional variations); that belong to the same ethnic group; that share the same religion and much of the same culture; that are among the wealthiest countries in the world — not just in the Arab world — have no room at all for their fellow Arabs.

They are perfectly happy, it seems, to let hundreds of thousands to squeeze into an already saturated Europe, into countries that have not, for the most part, succeeding in assimilating or integrating existing Arab, Turkish, Somali, and other mainly Muslim minorities. The flood of migrants heading not just for Europe but for specific states — notably Germany and the UK — has created a massive humanitarian crisis that European countries are finding it difficult to handle. Refugees arrive in some of Europe’s poorest states, mainly Greece, Italy and Hungary, but insist that they have a right to head for more prosperous nations, where welfare benefits are higher and healthcare freely available.

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Abbas at UN Vows to Torpedo Oslo Accords, Netanyahu Calls Speech ‘Deceitful’

Palestinian Authority (PA) President Mahmoud Abbas threatened to stop abiding by the 1993 Oslo Accords in a speech at the United Nations General Assembly on Wednesday, accusing Israel of halting the withdrawal of its forces from disputed territories as stipulated by the peace agreement.“

As long as Israel refuses to commit to the agreements signed with us, which render us an authority without real powers, and as long as Israel refuses to cease settlement activities and to release of the fourth group of Palestinian prisoners in accordance with our agreements, they leave us no choice but to insist that we will not remain the only ones committed to the implementation of these agreements, while Israel continuously violates them,” Abbas said.ADVERTISEMENT

Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu said the speech was “deceitful and encourages incitement and lawlessness in the Middle East.”

Israel did unilaterally withdraw from the Gaza Strip in 2005. Since then, the terror group Hamas has taken over control of the coastal enclave, leading to thousands of rockets being launched at the Jewish state. The latest such rocket was intercepted by the Iron Dome missile defense system over the Israeli city of Ashdod on Wednesday. Israeli officials have expressed concern that a similar situation could arise in Judea and Samaria should Israel withdraw from that region completely.

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Morning Briefing – The Telegraph

Good morning.

Jeremy Corbyn is off to Scotland today, attempting to draw a line under the row over Trident that consumed the final day of Labour’s party conference. He may find greater sympathy for his position there, as a YouGov poll conducted earlier this year found that 48% of Scots want to scrap Trident, while only 25% of Brits would say the same.

The Labour leader will undoubtedly hope for an easier ride in Scotland after his swipe at Britain’s nuclear deterrent in his keynote speech, and his later promise to never press the nuclear button, sparked shadow cabinet revolt, with ministers questioning his suitability as a potential prime minister. Despite aspiring for a democratic “debate”, Corbyn’s emphatic opposition and insistence that he would never use the deterrent has left many puzzled. “For a deterrent to be effective there has to be both the physical capability and the willingness and intent to use that capability,” General the Lord Dannatt wrote in today’s paper.

How is Corbyn hoping to solve Labour’s Caledonian Conundrum? The Labour leader has told BBC Scotland that the party suffered north of the border due to its decision to join the Better Together pro-union campaign, which will irk moderates like Alistair Darling, who led the operation. “Mr Corbyn is…deluded about the strength of support for his brand of politics,” Allister Heath wrote in today’s paper. Tom Harris, a former Labour MP who lost his seat in May, warned that Scots will still support the SNP if they feel Labour has “no realistic chance of displacing the Conservatives”.

Jeremy Corbyn is also promising to give Scottish Labour more independence, tackling Johann Lamont’s infamous claim that it was treated like a mere “branch office”, suggesting that he may give its current leader Kezia Dugdale control of the whip for Scots at Westminster. But such an idea rings hollow, as the only Scottish Labour MP is Ian Murray, who has to stay loyal if he wants to remain in Corbyn’s shadow Scottish Secretary. Dugdale has had to toe the Corbynite line too, rowing back on her suggestion that Corbyn’s election would leave the party “carping on the sidelines” for years, so how independent does he really want his colleagues to be?

“Too many people have told me that they think the Labour Party lost its way.”

News

Cleaning Up Politics Pt87
Former MPs will be banned from working as paid lobbyists for six months after stepping down, following the “cash for access” scandal revealed by the Telegraph.

Rogue Strike
America and Russia are to hold urgent talks after Russian air strikes in Syria reportedly targetted US-backed rebels, not Isil. You can follow the developments on our liveblog, as Britain warned that these strikes are likely to drive people into the arms of Isil.

Finding NiMo
Nicky Morgan has become the first Cabinet minister to publicly state that she may enter the race to succeed David Cameron when he steps down. I’ve previously outlined why the Education Secretary could be well-placed for the Tory crown.

Electric Avenue
The electrification of two major northern rail routes is to be restarted, Patrick McLoughlin has announced, just days before Conservative party conference starts in Manchester.

Euroclash
European Commission boss Jean-Claude Juncker faces fresh questions about his role in designing Luxembourg’s controversial system of “sweetheart” tax deals after he released an 18-year old document that urged his government to monitor the system more closely. This comes as Nigel Lawson decided to lead a campaign group championing Britain’s exit from the EU.

Property Propriety
Nicola Sturgeon has attempted to shield the SNP from the police investigation into Michelle Thomson’s property dealings by insisting the party knew nothing about them when the MP was selected as a general election candidate.

Extra Charge
Lord Hanningfield, the former Tory peer, has been charged with fiddling his House of Lords expenses. The 75-year-old former pig farmer and one time leader of Essex County Council, will appear in court later this month charged with one count of false accounting.

DC: The Past Has Passed
David Cameron has called for Jamaica to “move on” from the “painful legacy” of slavery as he defied calls to apologise for Britain’s role in the slave trade.

One word from Jeremy Corbyn and a fragile truce over Trident deterrent is blown apart

Trident was always going to be the issue that risked undermining Jeremy Corbyn’s takeover of the Labour Party.

And so it came to pass on the final day of Labour’s party conference in Brighton, when seven members of his shadow cabinet questioned his suitability as a potential prime minister after he said he would never authorise the use of nuclear weapons.

Mr Corbyn, who until recently chaired the Stop the War Coalition, has never hidden his contempt for the Trident nuclear deterrent, which is based at Faslane in Scotland.

In the weeks leading up to his shock election as Labour leader, he repeatedly said that he wanted to scrap the deterrent, which comprises of four Vanguard class submarines armed with up to 16 Trident II nuclear warheads.

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Cameron Bests Obama in Diplomatic Showdown

British Prime Minister David Cameron offered US President Barack Obama a pointed clarification after the latter told world leaders that violent extremism is not limited to any one religion.

“Violent extremism is not unique to any one faith, so no one should ever be profiled or targeted simply because of their faith,” Obama said Tuesday at the United Nations Leaders’ Summit on Countering Islamic State and Violent Extremism.

In response, Cameron asserted that violent extremism must be stopped at the root, which in today’s world means radicalized Islam.

“Barack, you are quite right, that every religion has its extremists, but we have to be frank that the biggest problem we have today is the Islamist extremist violence that has given birth to ISIL, to Al Shabaab to Al Nusra, Al Qaeda and so many other groups,” Cameron said.

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