No Sat-Nav?

I have a little Garmin
It sits there in my car
A Garmin is a driver’s friend;
It tells you where you are.

I have a little Garmin
I’ve had it all my life
It’s better than the normal ones;
My Garmin is my wife.

It gives me full instructions
Especially how to drive
“It’s thirty miles an hour,” it says
“You’re doing thirty five.”

It tells me when to stop and start
And when to use the brake
And tells me that it’s never ever
Safe to overtake.

It tells me when a light is red
And when it goes to green
It seems to know instinctively
Just when to intervene.

It lists the vehicles just in front
And all those to the rear
And with account of this
It specifies my gear.

I’m sure no other driver
Has so helpful a device
For when we leave and lock the car
It still gives its advice.

It gives me such good counsel
Each journey’s pretty fraught
So why don’t I exchange it
And get a quieter sort?

Ah well, you see, it cleans the house,
Makes sure I’m properly fed,
It washes all my shirts and things
And – keeps me warm in bed!

Despite all such advantages
And tendency to scoff,
I do yearn just occasionally
To turn the damned thing off!

This entry was posted in Humor, Humour, Poems, Ruminations by OyiaBrown. Bookmark the permalink.

About OyiaBrown

Please send me, as a comment to this page, any old material you have for inclusion in The Daily Joke Alert - to help enable us all to have our fancy tickled regularly! Never mind the state it's in as I tidy everything up prior to publication. Don't let good material go to waste - and so much does. In the interests of the environment we should always try to re-cycle everything, especially jokes. You know that makes sense! You may find some historical stuff here, but this does not really matter as humor is fairly timeless.

One thought on “No Sat-Nav?

  1. I have a little Navman..hang on, no I don’t, I threw it out because it kept malfunctioning and then progressed to not functioning at all – now I use my mobile.

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