Oscar Pistorius Jokes

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Roses are red,
Violets are glorious,
Don’t try to surprise
Oscar Pistorius.
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She didn’t notice Oscar sneaking up behind her. It was the silence of the limbs.
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Oscar Pistorius. Not the first South African with a race problem.
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When Oscar Pistorius said he wanted to be just like able bodied athletes, who knew he meant OJ Simpson?
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Oscar Pistorius. Just because he has no legs doesn’t mean he’s unarmed.

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Surely Oscar Pistorious can’t be the first man to wake up legless on Valentines day and shoot up the missus while imagining she’s someone else!

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Oscar Pistorius has an incredible record of wins to his name.
Six gold medals, four silver medals and one argument.

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I think it’s safe to say that Oscar Pistorius won’t be getting his leg over tonight.

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And the Oscar goes to…
Prison.

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Oscar clearly misunderstood when his girlfriend told him that on Valentine’s Day he had to take her out.

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Oscar Pistorius is pleading not guilty due to temporary diminished responsibility. He claims he was legless at the time of the incident.
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Whatever happens in court, he still has a career. The IOC say he’s a front runner at the next Olympics for pistol shooting.
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Police reconstruction indicates that Pistorius lost it when, for his Valentine’s Day gift, his girlfriend gave him a pair of socks.
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New evidence has been found outside the Pistorius home that completely acquits him of his girlfriend’s murder……………. Footprints!
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Surely Oscar Pistorius isn’t the first man to wake up legless during Valentine’s night, then shoot all over his partner whilst imagining she’s somebody else?
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First Tiger Woods, then Lance Armstrong, and now Oscar Pistorius. I think Nike should start telling their athletes ” Just Don’t Do It.”
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Hollywood are doing his life story; it’s now going to be called Blade Gunner.
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If found guilty he’s gonna have to take it on the shin.
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Anyone making jokes about Oscar Pistorius is just prosthetic!
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Oscar Pistorius has said he won’t be entering any further races. I think he has to worry more about different races entering him, once he’s in prison.
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Well I guess we should count ourselves lucky Oscar Pistorius was competing in the mens’ 400m at the Olympics, and not starting it.