So you think you’re computer-illiterate? – 1

James' Funnies

Compaq is considering changing the command “Press Any Key” to “Press Return Key” because of the flood of calls asking where the “Any” key is.
AST technical support had a caller complaining that her mouse was hard to control with the dust cover on. The cover turned out to be the plastic bag the mouse was packaged in.
Another Compaq technician received a call from a man complaining that the system wouldn’t read word processing files from his old diskettes. After trouble-shooting for magnets and heat failed to diagnose the problem, it was found that the customer labeled the diskettes then rolled them into the typewriter to type the labels.
Another AST customer was asked to send a copy of her defective diskettes. A few days later a letter arrived from the customer along with Xeroxed copies of the floppies.
A Dell technician advised his customer to put his troubled…

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Pope’s Illness

Joke for today

The Pope was very ill, and nobody could cure him.
The cardinals called in an old physician recommended to them.
After an hour long examination, he comes up with a solution.
“I’ve got some good news and some bad news.
The bad news: The Pope has a rare testicular disorder.
The good news: “He can be cured…..with sex.”

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Great Dance Routine: James Cagney and Bob Hope


James Cagney and Bob Hope at a Friar’s Club meeting back when actors were real performers. Bob Hope was 52 and James Cagney was 56.

Back in the days of reasonable innocence, the year was 1955.

For the young folks, here is something you’ve probably never seen before and, unfortunately, you may never see again.

For us older folks, this is the best of the best, and we had it for many years! This is a side of these two entertainers you hardly ever saw,
but it shows you their enormous talent. Bob Hope, the  best of comedians, and James Cagney, mostly cast as the bad guy, a gangster in the movies.

How the west is complicit in Islamic Jew-hatred

The violence against the Jews of France, which has escalated as feelings have boiled over against the war in Gaza, is shocking and terrifying.

A mob of mainly Muslim demonstrators in Paris, reportedly armed with knives, axes and iron bars and chanting “Death to the Jews,” tried on Sunday to storm the Don Isaac Abarvanel Synagogue within which nearly 200 congregants were praying for the safety of Israel.

The attackers were kept at bay by members of Jewish defense organizations. A French Jewish journalist said: “Thank God they were there, because the protesters had murder on their minds and it took awhile before police reinforcements arrived.”


American Football And The Blonde

99999Of all the blonde jokes, this one has to be the best — because it makes American football make sense.
A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game. They had great seats right behind their team’s bench.
After the game, he asked her how she liked it.
“Oh, I really liked it,” she replied, “especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I just couldn’t understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents.”
Dumbfounded, her boyfriend asked, “What do you mean?”
“Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was…
‘Get the quarterback! Get the quarterback!’
I’m like….Helloooooo? It’s only 25 cents!!!!”