Dogs

Have you ever heard that a dog ‘knows’ when an earthquake is about to hit?

Have you ever heard that a dog can ‘sense’ when a tornado is stirring up, even 20 miles away?

Do you remember hearing that before the December tsunami struck Southeast Asia , dogs started running frantically away from the seashore, at breakneck speed?

Do you know that dogs can detect cancer and other serious illnesses and danger of fire?

Somehow they always know when they can ‘go for a ride’ before you even ask.

How do those dogs and cats get home from hundreds of miles away?

I’m a firm believer that animals – and especially cats and dogs – have keen insights into the Truth.

And you can’t tell me that dogs can’t sense a potentially terrible disaster well in advance.

Simply said, a dog just KNOWS when something isn’t right… When impending doom is upon us.

They’ll always try to warn us!

We should always listen.

 

Star Trek

The Iranian Ambassador to the UN had just finished giving a speech and walked out into the lobby of the convention centre where he met U.S. General Patraeus.

They shook hands.

As they walked the Iranian said, “You know, I have just one question about what I have seen in America.”

The General said, “Well, anything I can do to help you, I will.”

The Iranian whispered, “My son watches this show called Star Trek and in it there is Chekhov who is Russian, Scotty who is Scottish, Uhura who is black and Sulu who is Japanese, but no Muslims.

My son is very upset and doesn’t understand why there aren’t any Iranians, Iraqis, Afghans, Syrians or Pakistanis on Star Trek.”

The General laughed, leaned toward the Iranian ambassador, and whispered back:

“That’s because it takes place in the future.

George Galloway: You have to salute his indefatigability

The questions race through the mind like Grand Prix cars pelting round a chicane, but to each the only response is a squeal of mesmerised incredulity. After a week of undiluted governmental fiasco, who could have imagined that Ed Miliband would end it looking the most bamboozled, anaemic – yup, you guessed it – pasty? Who even knew a by-election was being held in Bradford before hearing the result… and who that did had an inkling of the shock to come? What does it say about the state of mainstream politics, and what does it presage for the future? And whatever next in the outlandish public life of George Galloway MP?

For every Allahu Akbar echoing through the mosques of West Yorkshire, 10,000 “gawd help us-es” will be resounding elsewhere at his latest renaissance, though none as anguished as Little Ed’s. We all know that by-elections are momentary snapshots with little long-term predictive relevance. Gorgeous George first reached Parliament in 1987 by taking Glasgow Hillhead from Roy Jenkins, who had originally won it for the SDP in a famous by-election upset.

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Even I’m starting to wonder: what do this lot know about anything?

When I first heard Francis Maude’s suggestion on Sky News that we might all stock up “a bit of extra fuel with a jerry can in the garage”, I did not, I must admit, panic. His remark seemed a little unwise – and you could hear, by the way he immediately began to qualify it, that he thought so too – but I let it pass.

What I was forgetting is that ministerial words about an immediate problem with basics like fuel or food is the only sort of ministerial statement which people believe. It was like when Edwina Currie, the then junior health minister, said in 1988 that most egg production was infected with salmonella. People stopped buying eggs. After Mr Maude spoke, they swarmed to the petrol pumps.

But now that I have heard the Conservatives’ private explanation, which is being handed down to constituency associations by MPs, I begin to feel angry.

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Lying Lefties, gruesome polyester chasubles and Dave’s bedtime Belgian buns

Crusading Left-wing journalists thought the internet was going to be their friend, enabling them to broadcast the evils of capitalism to a new audience. But things haven’t gone quite to plan. Instead, the web has thrown a spotlight on liberal hacks indulging in a habit that they just can’t kick, however hard they try.

I refer, of course, to making stuff up. With the best of intentions, naturally.

Let’s start with a journalistic hero of the London/New York literati who is being accused of breaches of professional ethics but denies any wrongdoing.

Step forward Robert Fisk, Middle East correspondent of the Independent – former employers of Johann Hari – who is in an extremely tight spot this weekend. Private Eye has printed a round-up of allegations made about him by fellow foreign correspondents on a private Facebook forum. They accuse this ferocious anti-Zionist of (and I’m choosing my words carefully) embroidering news reports that invariably cast the leaders of the “US-Israeli axis” as Bond villains.

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